Alright! This page is what it sounds like. Here are the rules I expect commenters to adhere to.
1. Mine. Not yours.
This is the harshest rule, so let’s get it out of the way. This is my blog. I don’t have to let you comment here, and if I think your comments are consistently problematic, I reserve the right to ban you regardless of whether you have flouted a specific guideline. Similarly, I reserve the right to edit/delete/not publish comments, though it is one I hope to use rarely.
I am a reasonable person. If you’re banned or a comment is deleted, and you’re not sure why, you can e-mail me [my e-mail is in the About Me section! Also, the bottom of this page.] and odds are good I’ll explain my reasoning and maybe even reconsider. I don’t want to be an asshole, but I do want to make clear that this blog is my own space.
2. No Oppressive Language
This is pretty straightforward. Don’t be -ist. And don’t use language that reinforces -ist structures. If you write an otherwise good comment that has, say, an ableist word, I probably won’t delete the comment. What I will do is edit it to redact the harmful language. If you write a comment that does not add anything to the discussion and that contains -ist language, though, I’ll probably delete it. So we’re clear.
3. Dissent Is Awesome
I think disagreement is really important in order for views to evolve, and if you think I or another commenter is wrong, I encourage you to say so. However, please do so respectfully. I would like to think that we all have roughly the same goals in mind (to wit: equality and anti-oppression work), so unless someone is really blatantly a troll that I somehow missed, please engage respectfully, rather than with knee-jerk anger. I understand anger is an important tool, but I react really badly to strong emotions and I’d rather avoid that stress if I possibly can.
So here, be nice if at all possible.
4. Don’t Derail
Shouldn’t be much of an issue, because I’m rarely going to be writing about Big Deal stuff–this blog is going to be pretty personal. However, it’d be nice if we could all strive to stay mostly on-topic in a given post.
5. Sometimes I Want Debate. Other Times, Not So Much
This is related to point three, above. Look, I love arguing. And if you think I’m wrong about something, particularly if you think I am working within an oppressive mindset or framework, please do call me out.
That being said…on some posts I’m not looking for that. Some posts are quite personal, and if you try to attack or invalidate my personal feelings under the guise of “debate”, without actually raising what I find to be a valid point*…I’m not going to publish your comment.
*Valid point: “I think this thing you’re saying is problematic! Here is why!” [or even: “I suggest Googling to find out why!”]
Valid point: “That’s as may be, but have you considered [alternate, yet non-erasing interpretation]?”
Invalid point: All variations of “Your FEELINGS are WRONG”.
And that’s all for now! If you think I’m missing something or have any questions, you can comment on this page or e-mail me at dorianisms [at] gmail [dot] com. Thank you!